KEN LAYNE

I'm doing the Wonkette thing for a while.

It has been too much fun. You get drooling American Nazis whining, Senate staffers asking for Iraq information, lefty "media critics" at the Chicago Reader demanding explanations ... it is perfect. This is a nation of idiots.

Meanwhile, all the Republicans either lose or go to Federal Prison. Sadly, this means Democrats will win. But what the hell, might as well have the other crooks pretend to run things for a year or two, until Cheney finally sets off those "suitcase nukes" he loves to think about.

Somebody took the Wonkette, washed it off with fire, and loaded a new skin on the thing. I like it. No more cutesy ... the Maureen Dowd mood is gone, and Ambrose Bierce has taken her place. And he's angry, due to being dead for 90 years.

Anyway, I'm now the "West Coast Bureau Chief." It was an accident. Things are getting worse by the minute, so come on over and watch America burn.

In honor of Veterans Day, here is a picture of the plastic-pumpkin-headed deer that's been freaking out everybody for six days.

Had to get up at 4 a.m. the other night to check the Internet news.

I had dreamed such terrible and detailed scenarios that the only way to verify the truth was to go to BBC News and Google to see if the world was actually ending in the same convincing way I'd just dreamed.

No, not just yet. We stagger on, for now.

» William S. Burroughs' thanksgiving prayer